Bokelskere.no

He is taken aback by this sudden rush of love he feels for Emma, and he decides to get in a cab to Earls Court and tell her how great she is, how he really, really loves her and how sexy she is if only she knew it and why not just do it, just see what happens, and if none of that works, even if they just sit up and talk, at least it will be better than being alone tonight. Whatever happens, he mustn't be alone...

These days the nights and mornings have a tendency to bleed into one another.

She suspects that she will never, ever dance in her bra in a room full of foam, and that's fine.

'I think you're amazing,' someone says to someone else, but it doesn't matter who, because they're all amazing really. People are amazing.

Wasn't this exactly one of the experiences she craved? Why couldn't she be more spontaneous and reckless? If she was too scared to swim without a costume how could she ever be expected to tell a man that she wanted to kiss him?

'Maybe they're in love.' 'And this is what love looks like - all wet mouths and you skirt rucked up?' 'Sometimes it is.'

'Fat girl,' she thought, 'stupid fat girl' this being one of the slogans currently playing in her head, along with 'A Third of Your Life Gone' and 'What's the Point of Anything?'

'So if I'm so awful -' His hand was on her hip now. '- which you are.' '- then why are you sleeping with me?' His hand was on the warm soft flesh of her thigh.

'So I've given this whole "growing old" thing some thought and I've come to the decision that I'd like to stay exactly as I am right now.'

Occasionally, very occasionally, say at four o’clock in the afternoon on a wet sunday, she feels panic-stricken and almost breathless with loneliness. Once or twice she has been known to pick up the phone to check that it isn’t broken. Sometimes she thinks how nice it would be to be woken up by a call in the night: ‘get in a taxi now’ or ‘I need to see you, we need to talk’.