I want my story to have a beginning, a middle, and an end, not the yawning middle without end which threatens no less if I connive at my father's philandering and live to guard his dotage than if I am led to the altar by a swain and die full of years, a wizened granny in a rocking chair. I must not fall asleep in the middle of my life. Out of the blankness that surrounds me I must pluck the incident after incident after incident whose little explosions keep me going.